Out On a Ledge
I was okay until I stepped out on the ledge - literally, in the Grand Canyon. I knew some pretty good mantras for walking through fear - "I've been through a lot in my life; I can do this!" or, "Pretend my children have been bitten by a snake, and I am the only one who is able to retrieve the antidote just up ahead." I know the best inspirational tricks. But, this time...
Nothing was working.
I looked down to the left and could not see the bottom of the canyon. I looked to my right and saw the same - a bottomless view. That is when fear started to grip me. Something like I had never experienced before. And, that is when the mantras started chanting in my head...but, my heart pounded harder and my knees were getting weaker.
I saw a large rock up ahead slightly, and I inched toward it. Grasping it and noticing my sight had gone into tunnel vision, I stared only at the large rock. Breathing was shallow and rapid. My heart felt like it was coming out of my chest. In the tunnel of vision I spied three small pinecones resting on the rock. I gathered them up to divert my attention, and began spinning them around and around in my hand.
Slowly the rhythm of the pinecones brought my heart into a like rhythm. I began picturing them as the Top Three - the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.
Then, another mantra entered my mind ... "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength."
This time the mantra wasn't an 'I' statement about what I can do, but what He can do.
Slowing heart rate...starting to look around, but still holding on to the huge rock in front of me...
Oh, the Rock.
It takes me a while sometimes, but I get it now.
You were there all along. Life is like that. When I take my eyes off of the true Rock, I start to fear. But, when I truly focus on the Rock...
I was ready to walk on...and, the view was amazing.